


Memories

by engel82



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-29
Updated: 2012-01-29
Packaged: 2017-10-30 07:56:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/329538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/engel82/pseuds/engel82
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He misses the memory they never shared.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memories

**Author's Note:**

> Written with the idea that Sam went to 2014 instead of Dean.

It takes time before Sam recognizes the voice. Torn between his visions of Hell and Lucifer’s apparitions, the soothing tone of the voice calling his name scares him more than comforts him. And he can’t tell Dean. There’s too much going on, more important things to worry about. Sam’s only one person. Compared to everything else, he doesn’t matter.

They’ve been on the run for a few weeks when Sam recognizes it and for a second he can’t breathe. He wants to call out to Dean, wants to tell him there’s hope but he can’t. The words die on his lips and even as he presses his thumb against the wound on his hand, Castiel’s voice stays.

“Sam.”

It doesn’t carry the same weight as ‘Sammy’; there’s no fear when Castiel says his name, no desperate pleas. Sam. It’s safe, it’s warm. Peaceful.  
It rolls off of him, over and over; his own name, begged and whispered, breaking him open, making him feel more than he’s allowed himself to since Cas has been gone.

He misses him. Constantly.

He misses the memory they never shared; the memory no one else remembers. The promise of redemption sealed with a kiss that had yet to come between a fallen Angel and Lucifer’s vessel.

_“When he comes for you...”  
“I won’t”_

“Sam.”

And he can feel Castiel’s lips on his neck, his hands crawling on his stomach and his familiar scent surrounding him. They replay every night everything that never happened, following the same motions they always do when Sam closes his eyes, vowing the same things again and again until his throat hurts, until he comes in silence and the illusion disappears.

“Sam.” Dean. “Hey Sam, you okay in there?”

He nods, knowing Dean can’t see him, and smiles. Cas is still with him. Nothing else matters.


End file.
